Category Archives: Uncategorized

Date: Before the Beginning of TimeMy Mood Is: righteously indignant I had a chance to talk to Melkor today. He’s really down about how Eru reacted to our music. I thought it was because Melkor was afraid of being punished — but really, he’s just afraid he might have lost Eru as his best friend. Turns outContinue reading “#9: Melkor Is Really A Sensitive Guy”

Date: Before the Beginning of TimeMy Mood Is: dejected So all anybody can talk about now is The World that Eru showed us. I’ll bet if we had the Flame Imperishable, we could create the World without Eru. Maybe I should go out to the Void and look for it — but if Melkor had no luck,Continue reading “#8: Manwë Is Such a Dick”

Date: Before the Beginning of TimeMy Mood Is: grousing Alright, let me finish my story. So Eru embarassed Melkor, which just seemed gratuitous and unnecessary to me. Melkor didn’t do anything he wasn’t asked to do. Then Eru called us all over the the Edge of the Void. I was afraid the big guy was going toContinue reading “#7: Eru’s Big Joke”

Date: Before the Beginning of TimeMy Mood Is: rueful Okay, Aulë is off mooning over that bitch Yavanna – I can see to whom she wants to “give her fruits,” if you know what I mean. Anyway, I have time to work on my blog. So Melkor and I showed Eru how much we could improve on HisContinue reading “#6: Eru’s Arrogance Is Pissing Me Off”

Date: Before the Beginning of TimeMy Mood Is: scared shitless A lot happened today, so I’ll try to be brief. Eru Ilúvatar summoned all the Ainur to a great conclave in the Empyrean Realm. We assumed it was going to be something really important; maybe Eru would show us the Flame Imperishable, or maybe he would tell usContinue reading “#5: Oh Crap, We’re In Trouble Now”

Date: Before the Beginning of TimeMy Mood Is: psyched! Melkor held his meeting today, of Ainur who are dissatisfied with the current situation. He held it well-nigh to the Outer Dark, as far from Eru Ilúvatar as possible. I thought that was a little strange, but Melkor explained that he wants our little plan to be a surprise. IContinue reading “#4: Melkor and I Have A Plan….”

Date: Before the Beginning of TimeMy Mood Is: Elated Today I was wandering around the Outer Airs, trying to find kindred Ainur, anyone who was annoyed as I was about all the singing. I mean, is this how we’re going to spend eternity? Because I’m tired of it already. Well, I wasn’t really paying attention to whereContinue reading “#3: Melkor Seems Like a Really Cool Guy”

Date: Before the Beginning of TimeMy Mood Is: Exasperated Went to go see Aulë about the singing. Guess what he was doing? SINGING! Wouldn’t shut up, either, even to hear what I had to say. And let me tell you, Aulë can NOT sing. Sounds like someone strangling a sea lion. Whatever a “sea lion” is. I’mContinue reading “#2: Aulë — Dumb As a Sack of Hammers”

Date: Before the Beginning of TimeMy Mood Is: Annoyed Eru has everyone singing again. What’s up with that? We have the entire Void to deal with, plus the rumor mill says there’s something called a “Secret Flame,” that Ilúvatar is supposedly keeping all to Himself. But we’re just singing. Tra la dee da. I’m going to complain.